An Update From The Author: Saying I'm not an advocate of relationships was probably misleading. To satisfy your curiosity of my personal view on the subject matter, direct yourself to "The End.," the last post written in February 2011. (This also entails the purpose of this literature as a whole.)
A Second Update From Your Author (6 March 2012): This is becoming an aspiration to define the term "love." An aspiration because it is that very thing I find hard to describe with words. But every then and again I come across someone who achieves to do so to some extent. You can find these quotes I call fancy structures of words in "special entries."

Sunday, July 10, 2011

Guys That Are Tastefully Tatted

I have been addicted to tattoos 6 years before I was legally able to get a tattoo without consent, when a show called Miami Ink made its debut. It may sound far-fetched seeing that I'm still almost completely bare-skinned, but the truth is, personally, I've always found it aesthetically pleasing.

After watching all three of the TLC Ink series and Discovery Channel's spin-off London Ink in addition to going under the needle myself, I still cannot fully explain to anyone why people get tattoos. But I do believe, on the surface, it is art, just like any other. Like a painting, it catches the attention of your eyes causing your physical body to stop, and thus allows your cranium to stimulate interpretations and questions. Is this not how we approach a stranger who's externally pleasing?

Picture this, except with better
tats than these obviously fake
as fuck ones on Crawford.
I wish I could say that is exactly what I did when I stumbled upon a certain gentleman in the department store yesterday. It might have been the way he dressed: crisp white button-down with short sleeves tucked into black slacks that dropped just above the heel of his black dress shoes. Or the way he was groomed: slicked back dark black hair with an all around clean shave. Or the fact that his black&white head-to-toe ensemble included the cleanest array of black and white tattoos on both arms. The left of several birds, eagle included. The right of various typographic pieces, under elbow placement included. Both classic and modern.  

Only on two previous occasions have I actually spoken to the male in question about his tattoo. The second I have nothing special to say about, but the first...Well, I was trapped between the wall the bed we shared was laid against and him. In the middle of the night, I awoke and somehow managed to end up in the perfect position to where when I opened my eyes, I saw his tattoo I had not noticed before. It was a symbolic all black piece below the side of his rib cage. With no surprise, I was initially pleased and realized the place where it laid permanent did however make it a little surprising. I very much liked this surprise. After mentioning this to him sometime later, I got the first-person background story. For reasons of anonymity I won't say much except that my racially profiling mother was wrong, people without colored skin can hold their family dear just as much as people with yellow pigment can.

And so I've had time to think about the turn-ons and turn-offs of tattoos on the opposite sex:

Mm, fuckin right Pharrell!

1. Black&White
2. All White Ink
2. Rib Cage
3. Side of the Neck
4. Symbolism
5. Cleverness
6. Sleeves

Full of Color .1
Face .2
Traditional/Ed Hardy-esque .3
Asian/Japanese (especially if one is Asian) .4
Several in Random Places .5
Most Cliches .6

Because I can't satisfy my own ink pleasures, I'm turned on by a male who can and that's why this is number ten.


fray said...

unf. this is true. there are so many ways for a tattoo to go wrong, when a guy does it right he has definitely earned special attention.

Vicky from Tampa said...

Beautifully written and detailed! I very much agree. However the 4th paragraph about the bed situation was a little confusing, please explain =)

Thirty-Nine Fifty said...

I admit, some of them do get confusing, but that's how they're meant to be, open for interpretation. The huge run on sentence was intentional, I don't want EVERYONE knowing EVERY detail of my business, haha.